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Monday, August 26, 2013

How to Stop Premature Ejaculation - 3 Easy Tips to Last Longer in Bed and Not Climaxing Too Soon

Premature Ejaculation happens to each and every man in different phases in his life. Of course it is something he is hoping to forget and get over and done with but there are times when a person has to take matters into his own hands and how to stop premature ejaculation should be the utmost priority.
This is not your usual chocolate moment - relax and ease out. It should not always be a quick masturbatory element on your part. What you have to do is experiment on how to stop premature ejaculation by finding out your boiling point. You have to understand the movement of your penis from stiffness to eruption. Even though it is your body, there are times when listening to Anatomy 101 would be a little helpful since you have to know that there Erection Stages that completes the whole process. It is about growing, filling lengthening, hardening beyond measurable doubts and the last part which is ejaculation.
Step #1: Experiment, Awareness.
The tip here is to go through the usual process of getting comfortable and close your eyes. When you feel that your legs are about to have muscle cramps, stop, relax and resume the masturbation. You have to be conscious of what you are doing here since the need to know how to stop premature ejaculation can be achieved just by paying attention to your movements and breathing.
Step #2: Positions to Avoid.
There are two major sexual positions you have to stay away from. Although for you to last longer, know how to stop premature ejaculation by not participating on the Missionary and Doggy Style. These two positions make you thrust a little stronger and not control your muscles.
Step #3: Pressure Points to Touch.
You have to master this technique on how to stop premature ejaculation by knowing where to apply pressure when you think you are about to ejaculate. These are areas near your perineum or that portion just in the middle of your scrotum and your anus. You could also apply some gentle tugs on your scrotum. Don't allow your partner to apply circular movements on it since you will erupt in no time. Should your partner do this, squeeze the head part of your penis in a gentle manner to help prevent having fireworks.
Try these steps to how to stop premature ejaculation to have a longer and lasting pleasure.

Monday, August 19, 2013

How to Deepen Your Relationship with Touch and Sex

“Passion comes easily in the early days of a relationship. Almost every word, glance and touch vibrates with lust. It’s nature’s way of drawing us together. But after the captivating rush of desire, what is the place of sex in a relationship? Besides pulling us in, can sex also help to keep us together to build a lasting relationship? Emphatically, yes. In fact, good sex is a potent bonding experience. The passion of infatuation is just the hors d’oeuvre. Loving sex in a long-term relationship is the entree.” Dr. Sue Johnson in Hold Me Tight.
Much of what we hear in popular culture and from some self help gurus is that passion is a passing sensation, which fades as a relationship matures. The high intensity of sexual desire that characterizes the beginning of your relationship is thought to inevitably diminish with time. Unfortunately, too much emphasis has been placed on the mechanics of sex: positions, techniques, and toys to enhance physical bliss.
When couples feel secure in their relationship, then emotional connection creates great sex and great sex deepens the emotional connection. For emotionally accessible, responsive and engaged couples, sex becomes intimate play where sexual needs, deepest joys and vulnerabilities are shared. Sexually satisfied couples are truly ‘making love’.
Happy couples attribute only 15-20% of their happiness to a satisfying sex life. On the other hand, unhappy couples believe that 50-70% of their unhappiness is due to an unsatisfying sex life. (McCarthy & McCarthy, 2003). The reason sex is such a big issue with unhappy couples is because it is the first thing affected when a relationship begins to falter. It is not usually the real problem, but more of a symptom. It is a bit like the “canary in the mine” warning a couple of danger. It signals that the couple do not feel emotionally safe which each other. The security of our emotional connection defines our relationship in bed as well as out.
The most common physical sexual problems are low sex drive for women and premature ejaculation for men. This is not surprising. When women are unhappy in relationships they typically feel alone, emotionally disconnected. If they are seeking reassurance that they are valued for who they are as a person and do not receive it they shut down sexually. When men are unhappy, they often focus more on their sexual performance and their own release rather than focussing on pleasing her. When she senses this, it can make her feel more alone and sex becomes less pleasurable for her. This reinforces his sense of inadequacy, and the sexual issues continue, increase and then are seen as ‘the’ problem for a couple. Most often, when couples can create a secure emotional connection, their sex life improves automatically.
Deepening Your Connection through Touch and Sex
If you or your partner is not feeling emotionally secure and safe in your relationship, it will not be possible to have a constructive conversation about improving the quality of your sex life. I have written in previous articles about how to create a greater sense of security by learning how to stop destructive conversations and how to de-escalate conflict. Appreciating the vulnerabilities of your partner is also a prerequisite for deeper conversations. For those of you in more secure relationships, you must have the courage to reveal your own deeper desires and needs and have the courage to ask your partner for the love you need.
If you and your partner are feeling emotionally secure, then below are a few suggestions to deepen your connection through touch and sex. Some of these may be very hard to do. Perhaps more attention on touch than sex would be good place to start. Remember to stay open, responsive and engaged as you have these conversations. Try these and have some fun!
1. With your partner, recall a time in your relationship when sex was really satisfying. The person who tends to initiate sex less goes first. Share the story of this pleasant and happy experience with your partner in as much detail as possible. Talk about what you think made it so memorable. Then the other person shares a different story.
2. Have a conversation about “If I was perfect in bed.” One person begins by saying: “If I were perfect in bed, I could, I would______________, and then you would feel more______________.” Share at least three responses with each other.
3. Think of all the ways touch can show up in your relationship. For example, holding hands while out together, a spontaneous hug while making dinner together, giving a shoulder or back massage or brushing her hair. Take turns telling your partner your favourite nonsexual ways of being touched.
Touch can be enjoyable in and of itself as a way of connecting emotionally. It does not always have to lead to sex. Spontaneity, anticipation, surprise can create the right mood. Touch is a powerful expression of love. Sex can then be simply for fun, as way of getting close, a straight forward release, a way to deal with

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Good Sex Is a Good Thing

Sex. It can ignite our senses, fill us with ripples of pleasure and awaken a new dimension of feeling for our partner. Lovemaking doesn't require extraordinary skill, nor is it limited to young couples in the throes of passion. Couples of all ages can cultivate sexual bliss for the duration of their lives together.
So what's the trick? One of the most important and often overlooked components of a rewarding sex life is exercise. Regular exercise can pique sexual desire and make sex more enjoyable.

Good Sex Is a Good Thing

Though definitions vary, "good sex" might be thought of as an act of intimacy that promotes health and well-being. Good sex provides significant physical and physiological benefits. Enjoyed in the context of a happy relationship, "sex boosts chemicals in the body that protect against disease," says Paul Pearsall, Ph.D., author of the book "Superimmunity."
Research also suggests that sex and masturbation can help ease joint and muscle pain, combat depression, promote heart health and lengthen life span.
All too often, however, we haven't the time or energy for sex. According to the Masters and Johnson Institute, at least a third of American couples experience a lack of sexual desire. After a stressful day at work, it's easy to neglect the ultimate celebration of human pleasure.
There are ways to ensure that lovemaking remains a passionate, intense and regular part of our repertoire no matter what our age or how busy our lifestyle.

Create Energy for Sex

The surest way to whet sexual appetite and increase sexual activity is through physical exercise. Potent medicine, aerobic exercise revs up hormones, flushes stress, whittles away fat and rejuvenates the body, filling us with renewed vigor, greater confidence and the glow of good health. Regular exercise also increases blood flow to the genitals, priming men and women for sex.
"Beginning a fitness routine has made a difference in our sex life," remarks 42-year-old Mary Jane Platt, a mother of three. "Since we began biking together, we have so much more energy for each other. It's wonderful."
Mary Jane's experience isn't unusual. A University of California study of middle-aged, sedentary men found that after just one hour of exercise three times a week, the men demonstrated improved sexual function, more frequent sex and orgasms and greater satisfaction.
Similarly, researchers at Bentley College in Massachusetts found that women in their 40s engaged in sex more often (about seven times per month), and enjoyed it more than a sedentary group of peers. Since sex can be an act of endurance, improving cardiovascular fitness with aerobic activity such as walking, running, cycling or swimming for at least 30 minutes, three times per week, will help both partners perform longer and more often.
Push-ups and sit-ups or crunches are also beneficial exercises to add to an aerobic routine. They strengthen the shoulders, chest and abdominals, all of which are utilized during sexual intercourse. Keeping these muscles strong helps increase strength and stamina, adding to prolonged, more pleasurable sex.

Warm Ups for Sex

Unlike the muscles in our arms or legs, sex muscles are rarely active during the course of the day. However, by strengthening these "secret" muscles, couples can enjoy more intense sex. Kegel exercises firm the muscles of the vagina, helping women gain muscle control (to grip the penis) and reach orgasm more easily.
Men can use this exercise to delay ejaculation by contracting the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles just before orgasm, then fully relaxing them. Named after Los Angeles physician Arnold Kegel, these exercises strengthen the PC muscles in the pelvis. Though sometimes confused with the abdominal muscles, PCs are the muscles used to stop the flow of urine midstream (not the muscles used to hold in your stomach or tighten your buttocks).
Here's how Kegels work: Contract your PC muscles by clenching, as though stopping urine, and hold for at least two to three seconds per squeeze. Inhale as you squeeze each time and try to fully relax your muscles between each contraction. So you don't get sore, start with just 10 or 20 squeezes. Kegels can be practiced nearly anytime and in any place.
Try them in the morning with each bite of breakfast, while chatting with a co-worker, while watching television or flipping the pages of a magazine until you can do at least 100 to 200 each day. "The squeeze" is fun and easy, and can stimulate erotic feelings. Daily workouts for about one month should yield results.

Stretches for Sex

The following pelvic stretches will help keep the muscles used during sex limber and flexible and help facilitate orgasm. Each stretch can be done in the bedroom on a firm mattress or on the floor. Wear either loose clothing or nothing at all, and consider playing your favorite music. As these exercises can arouse strong sexual desire, you may wish to try these with your partner.

Pelvic Lifts

Lie on your back with knees bent and slightly apart. Feet should be flat on the floor and arms at your side. Inhale, clenching your abdominals and buttocks and lifting the pelvis until your back is straight. Take care not to arch your back. Breathe as you hold the position for at least 10 seconds. Exhale as you lower your body and repeat the exercise.
After you complete your lifts, try a few pelvic bounces, an exercise that can "evoke powerful sexual feelings," according to sex therapists David and Ellen Ramsdale.
As with the pelvic lift, knees are bent and slightly apart. Your palms should face up. Inhale and lift your pelvis just slightly off the ground. Then, exhale and let it down so your lower back bounces gently against the floor. Experiment with variations. Your goal is to feel a sense of openness and release.

The Butterfly

Lie on your back with knees bent. Feet should be together and flat on the bed. Next, pull your feet in until they touch your buttocks. Turn your ankles so the soles of your feet are facing each other and touching. Your knees will point out to the sides of the bed.
Lower your knees toward the bed taking care not to force them down. You or your partner may gently press downward on your inner thighs. When your knees are as far apart as is comfortable, hold for 60 seconds. Gently bring the knees back together with your hands and relax.
This exercise can also be done sitting up, back-to-back with your partner. Sit up as straight as possible with your spines pressed gently together. Relax your shoulders and keep your head in line with your spine. Bring your feet in as close to your body as possible, and turn them so your soles touch and knees point out. Clasp your feet. Breathe deeply and watch as your knees begin to lower, taking care not to force the knees down.
The butterfly is also beneficial for menstrual irregularities urinary problems and is thought to help ease the pain of childbirth.

Sexual Fitness

There are many other exercises and stretches that can enhance not only our sex lives but our mental and physical health. Yoga and dance classes offer great workouts and help stretch the pelvic region. Swimming and other sports that involve kicking motion, are also beneficial.
Regular exercise of almost any kind helps elevate energy, stamina, passion, pleasure...all aspects of our sex lives. So exercise and enjoy! The benefits are many.