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Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Sex and Marriage

In the beginning of marriage, intimacy and sex are very important for majority of couples. As life goes on, according to different studies, variety and frequency of married sex can not be even compared with sex before or outside marriage. Married couples usually have sexual or romantic activity one or two times a month. On average basis, married couples have sex with their spouse no more than once a week which ends up being 58 times a year according to data collected from the General Social Survey, which has tracked the social behaviors of Americans since 1972. This rate of recurrence would be completely unacceptable for majority of single people or people having extramarital relations. For majority of couples, as years go on, regularity as well as assortment of married sex is dropping drastically bringing marriage to a stage of being sexless. Fifteen percent of all married couples have not had sex with their spouse in six months to one year period with tendency to continue living in a sexless marriage.

According to Wikipedia, Marriage is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged in a variety of ways, depending on the culture or subculture. Historically, marriage institution has been created by society and regulated by government as a union of one man and one woman to organize, regulate and protect organization and structure of civilized culture. From the social order point of view, people have been getting married based on legal, social, emotional, economical, spiritual, and religious reasons. Emotionally, we always expect marriage to be declaration of eternal love. In reality, are interpersonal relationships: intimate and sexual still continue being major part of marriage through years of commitment?

What these tendencies come from? Do all of these people have very low sex drives, and may even be asexual? Are reasons of sexless marriage physical and differs from couple to couple, or is it social?

We should be practical and reasonable enough to admit the fact that maintaining the passion alive forever is not realistic for majority of people. Passion has a tension to simply fade out making sex boring and undesirable. Excitement and anticipation are gone. Passion and spark disappear. This situation becomes critical if one partner does not want or can not continue living in a neutral stage and can not leave a marriage.

Being married means having responsibilities and obligations of having children, getting a career, and providing for a family. Having good sex rarely made a priority... The biggest problem is that it’s very seldom to be acceptable for both spouses. Majority of times, lack of sex is unthinkable and frustrating for at least one spouse, and feeling sexually unsatisfied can result in all sorts of issues. Marriages that stand up for many years can reach a certain point where passion fades out, sex becomes dreadful and is often faked, leading to numerous marriage and sex problems.

… I am one of a married people you know. I’m a successful businessman who has great family, two beautiful children and a great career. My marriage became sexless around fifteen years ago as my wife had no desire for sex and I finally gave up after years of begging. Being completely frustrated, five years ago I started looking through married dating sites and eventually began having an affair with a woman who was also in a sexless marriage. I was not looking for a new partner every day, neither I was interested in leaving my family or breaking somebody else. Our five-year monogamous relationship likely saved both our marriages…

Are extramarital relationships a solution to the problem? Not for society standards and not from morality point of view.

Majority of us make a promise to love each other until death do us part sincerely believing that passion, desire and spark will be a major part of married life forever. In reality, these main components of human connection have an ability to disappear leaving couples struggling with decision to either leave a marriage or to find a way to fulfill this void. is a site that clearly describes it purpose by its name. It is giving you a chance to find this special connection, build new level of discreet relationship and mature dating.